89 Tag Lines

The system that powers this weblog was recently upgraded with a new open-source weblog platform (because the world needed one more). What separates this weblog system from all of the others? The clever name: Blörg.

In the process of the upgrade, I’ve retired the randomly rotating tag-line/sub-title in the header of the site. Looking through the tag-lines in the old database, we accumulated 89 phrases. Most are insipid, however, I do think there are some flashes of accidental genius amongst the stupidity, embarrassing earnestness, and inside jokes.

For posterity, here are the 89 Acts of Volition weblog tags lines, all used at some point in the last five years:

  • machine readable
  • There’s nothing funny about Comic Sans.
  • The Axis of Awesome
  • Standing on the shoulders of giants
  • Not too strong in the maths.
  • Equal parts consumption and production
  • ad hoc ad hominem ad nauseam
  • Truths, albeit insignificant.
  • Hack the Casbah
  • AOL Keyword: Awesome
  • grace over karma
  • My ass is as smart as any.
  • I hate Winnipeg
  • “Tune the FM in to static and pretend its the sea” ― John K. Samson, The Weakerthans
  • be the change that you wish to see in the world
  • end-times = near
  • Objectivity is a lie.
  • Up with Metric Time! 10 Hours a Day!
  • It’s hip to be square.
  • Hey, that’s a spade!
  • if ($road==’diverged in yellow wood’ && $road==’less traveled’) { $the_difference=’all made’ }
  • I’m tired – let’s bring back that whole slacker thing.
  • It’s all about the Pentiums, baby!
  • “Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.” ― Henry David Thoreau
  • Everyone loves the future.
  • alt.total.loser
  • Jesus was a punk.
  • Quit while you’re ahead.
  • Adhocracy Now!
  • my virtual cup runneth over
  • My mom cleans my house.
  • extra ordinary
  • get rich slow
  • Great is the enemy of good
  • zip zap zipadee doo
  • Better. Brighter. Tougher.
  • all about alliteration
  • bah, humbug
  • want amidst plenty
  • I like to meat new people.
  • They pelted us with rocks and garbage!
  • I’m your internet hero.
  • Robots are people too
  • Spammers go to hell
  • Where quality of life is measured in MHz
  • I only wear free t-shirts
  • Dupe! No Digg!
  • Ok, this is lame.
  • BOGUS, WONTFIX, NOTABUG, WORKSFORME
  • Terrorists Win!
  • It’s never been a better time to be a nerd.
  • It’s still morning on the Internet
  • I figured out what’s wrong with life: it’s other people.
  • Stupidity is much the same the world over.
  • Language can be unsuitable for younger viewers. Use caution – they are our future.
  • Now with more links.
  • Relax. Take your pants off.
  • Lately, the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labour.
  • Pamplemousse. Biftek. Poutine. Dindon. Chauve-souris.
  • What are you going to do about apathy? Not much.
  • Virtual thoughts.
  • A site for, but not about, endorsed by, or even moderately related to, Phil Hartman. R.I.P.
  • Not, in any way, affiliated with Chicken Soup for the Soul.
  • Random Thoughts. Pumpernickel, for example.
  • Formatted text from (un)formatted minds.
  • Insert snappy subtitle here.
  • Everything in its right place.
  • Driven by contempt for you the reader.
  • Are we being sarcastic? We don’t even know anymore.
  • sarcasm is cowardly
  • Be excellent to each other.
  • Publishing without deadlines since August, 2000.
  • beware the fish
  • Gazing at your navel.
  • Pioneering the utopian one-pair-of-shoes-per-person future.
  • Save often, kids.
  • No coins please.
  • Nascent guruism
  • You can’t coach height.
  • The human head weighs eight pounds.
  • may cause shrinkage
  • Who’s the bully now!?
  • We promise nothing.
  • A good chew and peanuts too.
  • kind of like that Alanis Morissette song
  • Free Sklyarov!
  • Like waggling a big beef in front of a hungry dog.
  • Was it Eliot’s toilet I saw?
  • So Say We All