I suppose I could write up a description of this how-to guide, but a description has already been written, and I am a busy, busy man after all, so here’s a quote:

I don’t mean to brag, but I’ve never really had a hard time getting beaten up. However, for the longest time, after someone kicked my ass, instead of going to jail, as I would have preferred, that person would just go wash-up. That is until I read this guide that I’ve written.

Clearly, this man is a genius. Depending on you level of tolerance for disgusting pictures of the human foot, you should also check out the aptly named stinky feet wherein the author attempts to infect himself with athelete’s foot. Possibly the funniest thing I have ever read in the Internet. Again, not for the squeamish.